I can't continue...I just can't...And thats my depression...

16 posts | Original | Recent
 
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139 Posts
Oct 15, 2015 5:59pm
via Android

Happiness...Happiness is the most valuable good in life.Without happiness...You are a nothing...I lost my happiness 1 year ago and i lost everything...My self...My confidence...My courage...My dreams...Everything is gone...This is due to my terrible loneliness...I can't be more Foreveralone and single than nobody.Just believe me.Being single for ever created this hell to me.I have nothing left now.Yesterday i talked with a girl that i really really love...I talked to her a bit depressed cause i wanted to talk about my problems with her.She really got mad.She couldnt believe that i am this guy.She were afraid and she said dont do anything stupid Christos please.I said dont worry and dont take it like this...If it was like that i would have already left a long time ago...Then she said with caps on AND TAKE IT LIKE WHAT?YOU ARE NOT ALRIGHT AND AS LONG AS WE ARE FRIENDS I CARE ABOUT YOU CANT YOU UNDERSTAND?Then i was really really sad...Cause i am making everyone sad because i exist...Thats why i dont wanna share my pain with nobody.Cause my pain is making pain to the others...Thats why i hide everything inside me...Thats why i am such a depressed fool.And i hate my self.This shit is affecting my life,school and my love life.Its like a hell streak.I worry about me.Then i worry about my school.Then i worry about my future.Then i worry about 'What i am supposed to do in this world?Why i exist?Should i have to exist?If yes?Whats the reason?To suffer?To live this torture?What?' I've lost everything.I have nothing.The only thing that i need now it's a good friend on my side.Cause that would make me feel better.He or she would help me with everything.But i dont feel comfortable with nobody...My hyperhydrosis makes me feel so bad with everyone.I cant wave i cant do nothing.I asked a doctor and she said its caused from stress and cause of psychology.I want someone to judge me.But with the truth.Not lies.Because i judged my self.I have a belief of who i am.But people continue telling me some things that i cannot believe.I just cant...And all of this is so sad...i dont know who i am.And i cant be my self.I heard a lot of people judging me but everyone have a different belief.But i didnt know if he was like an enemy...or like a friend...I feel ugly but nobody never called me ugly...They called me the opposite.I still feel a bit fat...But nobody call me fat.They call me the opposite...Thats how i feel...My last words are these.I want a real friend...A true friend.That will understand me.To listen to my pain and help me get rid of this sick worst depression ever.Or maybe something that would be the best....A girlfriend.But how to do this while i am in this shit...I feel so damaged that i dont have the power and the confidence to stand in front of a girl and ask her...Thats my depression everyone...I hope i was clear and understandable...Cause i am useless

15 Oct
Chris u are reaching for help. Good job. I've been where u are now the next step is getting professional help because nobody can fix this but u. No girlfriend, no job, no friend. Only u beautiful soul. Hug
15 Oct
Thank you but i am not gonna get any help.The only ine who can helo me its my self...I just need a friend in real to talk with him or her face to face and remove these tones of pain from my back...
15 Oct
Ok...I'm a stranger so any time u need me to listen I'm here
15 Oct
Val is right man. I've been through psychological problems too and know how hard it is to seek professional help. It is still you who needs to solve the problems but in this state you can't do it alone. And no one without professional qualifications can help you get you out there. Friends would want to help but don't know how and get very sad about being helpless. PLEASE: seek professional help! Best!
15 Oct
No i dont want.I cant.I will not.I will die i cant hell no man
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953 Posts
Oct 16, 2015 2:14pm
via Android

I dunno how old you are but it seems like you are taking this whole 'foreveralone'  thing way too seriously.

Find some things that interest you which you can be passionate about. Find other ways to define yourself other than 'alone'.

I was an awkward lonely guy for most of my youth. It gets better.

16 Oct
I am 16 and close to 17 years old man...
17 Oct
Well that's really young. Most ppl are in a really weird time of life then, even those who appear happiest. I was awkward and single until like 20 years old... it doesn't last forever
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33 Posts
Oct 16, 2015 4:38pm
via iOS
Chris, you know you can always message us if you ever need anything, anything at all? you can trust us, even if you can't trust yourself.
16 Oct
I dont need online stuff...I want a good friend in real life.And i am trying to have a good relationship with a girl that cares about me and i love her like nothing else...But i dont have the power to telk this to her.Cause i feel shiy with my self
16 Oct
I dont have the power to talk to her*And i feel shit with my self*
16 Oct
I understand that, but if at any point you're not able to express your feelings through words, you know where to go.
16 Oct
I know how to express my feelings.But i have nobody to hug me and listen to my pain and my problems seriously.There is 1 person only.That i started to talk with her some days ago
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2 Posts
Oct 16, 2015 6:14pm
via Android

Hey guy i know im not supposed to give my number here but text me 8645404959 i will gladly talk and share life is hard but it does get better remember the best things never come easily it will always be hard to have a good life

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1 Post
Oct 16, 2015 6:47pm
via Android

Hi Christos, It was brave of you to post how you are feeling and I hope you have been reading the replies and finding strength from what others are sharing. I have a son your age and so as a parent and someone who has had a lot of difficulties with depression and loneliness my whole life I want to give you my warmest thoughts and join the others who have posted in reminding you that you are not alone in how you are feeling now.  Don't give up. I often remind myself that everyone has a purpose and we influence everything around us with our unique qualities, our experiences, our joy and our sadness.  People come in and out of our lives and we learn and grow and share all the time.  I sincerely hope you find someone to talk to, who will remind you how important you are to them.  Have a run or a walk too, that helps a lot as well!

16 Oct
Thank you beautiful mom.Yes.I am trying to find a person like that.I am looking for this friend these days and i think i find someone.She is awesome,beautiful and she wanna help me.I am trying to get closer with her all the time but...I need to stay strong.Thank you again.Cause you are a mom like mine.And you said things that are gold.Like everyone here
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334 Posts
Oct 16, 2015 7:30pm
via Android

Hi Christos,

I was in two minds about replying. Whether it would help. You see, I've read a lot of good advice here but I'm unsure on whether you're ready to take it in.

Depression is like a tunnel...no matter how much there is light in front of you all you can focus during that 'period' is the darkness coming from the back and sides. No matter how much we will provide positive energy it will not penetrate until you are ready to receive it.

'Forever' is a long time. We change daily. You are not the same person you were yesterday, a week, a month or a year ago. By that same logic you could improve your situation day by day. Step by step. Again though, it is different for different people. You need to find your source and your weapons against it.

In regards to relationships I personally think you need to first and foremost concentrate on yourself. It sounds cheesy but until you respect and love yourself you will not be able to believe that anyone else can.

It's not easy. It's not going to be solved overnight but I believe you do have love around you. What's important though is you believing that.

We all face our own personal demons. You are facing yours. Fight back any way you can. Once you do, you'll see that even this period was there to teach you something valuable.

Apologies on my long message and wishing you to get out of the dark soon.

16 Oct
Every kind of message is welcomed Heidi.Thank you for your words and your help.I am trying from yesterday to love and accept my self.But i want somone to show to me that i have a value for him or her.Everyone thinks some things are funny while are not.And that is pissing me.This girl that i am talking about all the time is my savior.She is my angel.If i will get closer to her and talk more and more with her.So our relationship as friends will grow better and stronger.But i also love her...But i can't do nothing as long as...
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99 Posts
Oct 17, 2015 4:55am
via Android

I know you probably dont wanna hear this and it might sound harsh but honestly youre still too young to be worrying about love and relationships. You are at the age where you should focus on yourself and your future. Trust me life is not all about love. This is coming from someone who got married at your age. I dont regret it but i do wish that my main focus wasnt about finding love or being in a relationship at that young age.
But then again i am focusing on myself now that im older and actually feeling so much better then i was then.
I think every teen goes through that depression phase so its quite normal. Im sure this phase will pass by soon.
Hope i wasnt harsh here. Good luck with everything :)

17 Oct
I definitely was depressed and unhappy when I was that age too.
17 Oct
Yeh its pretty normal because you're still trying to figure out the person that you wanna be
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136 Posts
Oct 17, 2015 6:32am
via Android

I guess I can't PM you if we're not following each other so I'll repost here.
Hi Christos. Hope you're well. My name is Alison and if you ever need to chat I'm around.
I left a comment on your post but wasn't sure if you saw it. I just said if you wanted, you could try a support group and maybe could meet a girl there.
It's hard being 17. It's hard being 18. In fact things get more challenging as you get older, however you learn to "cope" and or learn to shrug it off. One positive way to do this is making goals and accomplishing them like the Dare to Shred again I see you doing.
When I was your age (I'm 30 now) I was feeling just as you are. I hated everything, I was angry and sad at the same time. I wish I was doing and making goals like you are...I think you're doing a great thing by eating well and working out. Girls are mostly interested in themselves at 17 & 18. Both genders break each others hearts and we're all confusing. (especially women, most of us don't know what we want til we're my age) I know its hard to understand when us older people say how important it is to work on yourself, but when you've gotten to our age and you think back to when your 16,17, 18, we wish we had focused our goals on ourselves instead of chasing after someone else...you WILL have many loves. It's something that happens and this girl who cares for you and you love...well, she wants you to be happy. And you know what? You can't love someone truly until you love yourself. I know I sound lame. I keep trying to think what 17 year old me would do reading my words....I probably wouldn't listen to me, but that's OK. You are young, its great! Enjoy your youth! Even though I was depressed in my youth too, looking back now, its OK I was sad, angry and rebellious, for me, it makes up who I am. I learned from it. Be Proud of you and your accomplishments. You're doing great and again, if you need a friend, I am available. Have a good weekend stud!

17 Oct
This girl can't help you Christos...I know you believe she can, but she is young too. I encourage you to keep talking to her, but although you believe she's your savior the ONE person who can make everything better is you. YOU are strong I can tell, because you posted here for us to know you.
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2 Posts
Oct 17, 2015 7:57am
via Android

Yeah I almost forgot you might not want to hear this but just try it. Give yourself to God please you don't need a girl to make you happy. Even when you have God in your life just ask for the perfect girl and you'll get it. Jesus loves you

17 Oct
God do not interact in our lives.I am a Christian and i know my religion.
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280 Posts
Oct 17, 2015 5:13pm

Ok Christos you remind me of myself I also often have these thoughts creep into my head, I also at times feel alone and depressed and sometimes I feel as if there is no hope. However one night I was feeling very much down and out until I saw this video.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EhUHdcamprY

And if you have more questions I would be sure to commuinicate with you.

18 Oct
This video was awesome
18 Oct
Glad you liked it and hope it helped.
18 Oct
I feel really better today.I am trying to accept and live with my self.Cause this will be me for my whole life.Lets see if i am worth of my self
18 Oct
No!!! The Christos that comes out of this is going to be better, stronger, and wiser than the one that's speaking right now.
18 Oct
:) I hope so
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21 Posts
Oct 17, 2015 6:10pm
via Android

Gains will solve ur gf problems.

17 Oct
I dont think so.And i dont want her to love me cause of my body...Cause of ME!
17 Oct
Didnt mean it that way.... gains heal ur soul ukno make u feel better ^^
17 Oct
Then why i feel the same while i lost almost 14 KG,toned up and while i changed my whole appearance?...
17 Oct
Only Rich piana would know the answer....
17 Oct
Funny...
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1655 Posts
Oct 18, 2015 2:25am
via iOS
Hey christos. Does it help you to know that I had severe depression at the age of 16.
My father had a major breakdown & I was left to support the family. At the same time I was dumped by my girlfriend, got in trouble at school & basically would fight anyone who looked at me the wrong way. 

Depression is a very dark tunnel & you've just gotta claw your way out of it. For me, I chose to fight but fight the right way. I got a good education, I kept toxic friends away from me & I slowly clawed my way out of that tunnel. 

My advice? And this is the advice I've given my 15 year old daughter who suffers from anxiety,... Put the damn phone away!! Get away from technology, away from the sh*t that is spewed on social media. Get outside. Run. Meet people. Make friends. Join groups. Laugh when you can, cry if you need to, but always remember that somewhere, someone is in much deeper shit than you are
18 Oct
Thats ultra right man.Respect.I am doing this.I am trying to meet people and find the right friends for me.Cause now i have nobody.I left all my friends cause at the end...Nobody is friend.I wanna find friends that will be with the real meaning 'Friends'.So i do.And i dont use social media and crap and all these shit.I just use Skimble.But the thing is...Now i have nobody to run with me...To have a company or something.I run alone and i walk alone.On my own.But if i can have even one friend...With the real meaning of a friend...Everything would be so great...About...
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6 Posts
Oct 18, 2015 6:08pm
via iOS
A teacher in high school told this to me when I was 16 and now I'm writing it to you. 

When I was your age I thought I knew the world and I was the only one with a lot of serious problems. Things seemed very important, like if some punk liked me or not. Now, several years later, I can see things in a different perspective. Stuff which is important to us in our adolescents just isn't anymore when you get older.

There's a logical explenation for it. Our brain isn't fully developed yet in our teens. (Although we think it is.) 

It will all be ok. Trust me.  
18 Oct
That sounds good.But i have a so strong believe that i will never do what i want...I am fighting hard for it.Till i see a single result.A good result and something that i was fighting for it.I never had love.But if i would get 1 i would take everything back that i've lost.Believe me.I feel it inside me and i know it.
18 Oct
You will. I can assure you. We can do so much more than we initially think. I've experienced it myself.
18 Oct
You rock lady!My respect!
18 Oct
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61 Posts
Oct 19, 2015 1:00am
via Android

I hear your pain man, and I understand because I have been there too. I also believe that you have the strength inside you to beat this... because I beat it.

Just remember, while you might not have any beside you physically when you run, you have all your Skimble friends beside you spiritually - for motivation, advice, and even just as a friendly ear and shoulder when you need to talk.

Adding you to my list to follow, and if you ever need someone to talk with my messagebox is always open.

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1 Post
Oct 19, 2015 1:31am
via Android

Take it a moment at a time. Sounds like you need this time to be alone so you can figure out who you areDon't think about yesterday.  Don't think about 5 years down the road.  Think about right now.  Change the things you can, accept the things you can't and take the time to gain the wisdom to know the difference.
Stop judging yourself.  By doing so you are your own worst enemy.  If you cannot accept yourself how can you expect others to do accept you?  By learning to not judge yourself maybe you won't allow yourself to be bothered when others choose to judge you.  Continue to strengthen  yourself physically but be sure to strengthen yourself mentally.  Read well reviewed books on this subject and how to beat it and cope with it.  One I'm listening and reading now is by Eckert Tolle, The Power of Now.  Highly recommend you get it.  Borrow it from the local library if you don't have the money for it.
Most importantly, don't do anything to harm yourself.  If you are concerned about hurting others now emotionally, think how they would be hurt if you weren't around.

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34 Posts
Oct 19, 2015 2:59am
via Android

Hey dude listen no body is alone ,Allah(god) is always with you so if you want to be alone you are not.Allah created everything for something , everything have some meaning, everything have value in front of Allah, consider a bacteria , plants , everything have some meaning , and you are human being ,in holy Quran it's written that human being is best creation,  so how can you nobody, please search yourself , yes it's age we want a partner in  life and you will get it soon , my dua is With you ,if you really feel alone, you can chat with me, my dua is with you

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