When Alexander Bell first invented the telephone he had three missed calls from Chuck norris
There used to be a street named after Chuck Norris but they changed the name because no one crosses Chuck Norris and lives
There is no such thing as a lesbian woman. Just women who never met Chuck Norris.
The US never had atom bombs. They threw Chuck from a plane
Yo mamma's so ugly Chuck Norris had to roundhouse kick her. . . . Twice!
Chuck Norris has a grizzly bear carpet in his living room. The bear isn't dead its just afraid to move.
Chuck Norris died 20 years ago. Death just hasn't built up the courage to tell him.
Chuck Norris doesn't flush the toilet. He scares the sh*t out of it.
Chuck Norris can choke a man with the cable from a wireless phone.
Ghosts sit around a campfire and tell Chuck Norris stories
Fear of spiders is aracnaphobia, fear of tight spaces is chlaustraphobia, fear of Chuck Norris is called Logic
Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. You answer the wrong phone.
Chuck Norris is so fast he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of his head.
Remember the Soviet Union? They decided to quit after watching a DeltaForce marathon on Satellite TV.
Lol! Poor chuck norris