Advise

7 posts | Original | Recent
 
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20 Posts
Jul 30, 2014 12:36pm
via Android

This is not sport related.

Im engaged to get married next year I have a son and my fiancee has a daughter. She is showing signs shes not happy with me in the picture quite literally. She came to our house with a drawing of her mum and dad and other people. She told me that im not in it cause there was no room but its of her dad and mum never mentioned who the other people were. They had been seperated for almost a year before we got together now coming on 2 years. The picture is on the fridge and I might be very much a drama queen. I try very hard with his daughter I do everything I can. My son doesnt see his dad so maybe easy for my side of things. But im hurt cause what else can I do? I know its just a picture but it speaks volumes on how she feels. Am I looking at it the wrong way?

30 Jul
Depends on daughters age and circumstances of divorce, but just have to give her time. Now this is also disrespectful to you that fiancé allows pic on fridge. If she had it in her room it's one thing but where it's at different story. You need his help also with her
31 Jul
It's good that you care, that's probably enough. Not that she's going to like you any time soon, it's a tough situation and you'll have to accept that you can't force her to like you. When I was a kid, my mom left and I was horrible to my dad. There were four of us, he went out of his way to take care of us all, and we were brats toward him for the first few years. I drew a picture of my mom coming back for me and it said "I love mom NOT dad". I can only...
07 Sep
I know how she feels ive been through the same phase. It happens to most kids when they see their parents arent together and they just have to get used to the fact that sometimes things just dont workout. When i was little both my parents left me and my grandma took me in, i had no contact with my dad what so ever. My brother lives with my dad and my grandma would do anything for me to see my brother but my dad and his family wouldnt allow it and i dont know why. Finally my dad decided...
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20 Posts
Jul 30, 2014 12:49pm
via Android

Shes only 5 buts shes very grown up for a 5 year old. When it was her dads birthday she gave him a present from her but said this is from my mum and looked right at me and smiled. Am I looking at this all wrong?

30 Jul
You have a legit right to be upset. Think you both need to sit down and have a talk with her before she gets older and things get worse. Also if you don't this in the long run won't be healthy for your relationship.. Good luck
30 Jul
Thank you :-)
30 Jul
This might be cruel to some.... Dethrone her!! tactfully:-)
30 Jul
My fiance doesnt see why its bothered me which is kinda why im questioning myself if Im being harsh or not
30 Jul
Don't forget your son while dealing with her:-) maybe frame it and pt it in her room...win-win
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9 Posts
Jul 30, 2014 4:47pm
via Android

She may act older than her age and all that but at the end of the day she's 5. Both verbal/non verbal 5 year old expresses self through actions, you can be in her pictures should you take a mother/family role in her life. She draws what she feels,  smells,  see and assumes. It's okay to talk to her if you and your man find fit, understand that at 5 years, if she miss the point of your message,  it may trigger not the best outcome. Spend time with her, do activities and support her passion,  love her as a daughter and step... Kids reads body language more than you can imagine,  be cheerful around her, be you, avoid these feelings of her not liking you and slowly but surely, things may turn out great...

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20 Posts
Jul 30, 2014 5:00pm
via Android

I am scared things get made worse.  I try really hard. I will make more of a effort to do more activities with her. I wish I could be more like my fiancee and have the laid back attitude. I feel guilty because my wee boy has also had to deal with the fact that he's had just me and all to himself for 7years and in the space of a year we've moved out our house to stay with my fiancee and his daughter when she stays. im working alot and its long hours to so he's always in bed when I come home so only see him for 10 mins in the morning some days. My fiancee daughter won't sleep at night and will often cry for about 2 hours before she falls asleep. My son is sound asleep within a half hour of going to bed.

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9 Posts
Jul 30, 2014 5:29pm
via Android

Change brings along questions and a lot of what if, most, if not all 5 year old needs sense of security, love, attention and someone that will cherish them no matter what,  as long as you're being a good role model/mom, you will get through this phase. Is okay to be scared,  worried and deal with unknowns but it's golden to stay on the path of that will lead to positive outcome... stay strong, sacrifice a little of your time and consider yourself the glue that will put all these together

30 Jul
Thank you so much. Youve all been a great help thank you
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168 Posts
Jul 31, 2014 7:26am
via Android

I didn't have time to read the whole story but i suggest you work out your arms, shoulders, legs, tights and butt.

Just keep moving a couple days a week. Example, Morning runs

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168 Posts
Aug 1, 2014 7:34am
via Android

How is it going so far? Did you take my advice?

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